While (at least for now) it is possible for same-sex as well as different-sex couples to legally marry, many couples choose to remain unmarried. If you are in a committed relationship without the automatic legal protections of marriage, you should think about using estate planning to protect your family. Legal marriage does not eliminate the need for estate planning, but the law makes assumptions about married couples and provides certain default protections that are not available to unmarried couples.

If your spouse dies, the law assumes that your spouse intended to benefit you with at least part of your estate (depending on whether your spouse has children). If you are not married, there is no automatic right to any property that is not already in your name. If you are not married, the only way to ensure that your partner receives any property is to make provisions in a will or trust that direct assets to your partner.

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Estate planning sounds as if it is only for people with a lot of resources, but in fact, every adult over 18 has a reason to consider doing some estate planning, because each of us has an estate worth planning. Why? Because estate planning is not just about giving away valuable assets. It is about deciding who will step in to help you, if you are incapacitated. It is about making sure your bills get paid. It is about giving anything you own to who you want, and not who the state of California thinks you would choose. Estate planning is how you can make sure that you end up with the arrangements you prefer.

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You want to be remembered, make a mark, have someone notice that you are gone.
There are as many ways to do this as there are individuals, but you must take certain steps to ensure your legacy will be available to those you care about. Without taking legal steps to designate what should happen if something happens to you, it will be difficult or impossible to accomplish your goals in the way you want. So what should you do?

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There are lots of reasons why people don’t write a will, or create a trust.  Mostly, it seems morbid, time-consuming, expensive.  So when I tell people what I do, I often hear that this is an item on their to-do list, but one that stays there indefinitely.  I want to help move it off the list, and give you the relief brought on by knowing that you have taken steps to maximize your autonomy, protect your family, and make plans for the worst case scenario.  And I want it to be painless and relatively quick and reasonably priced.

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The NY times blog The New Old Age takes on the idea, and the challenges of choosing to move before there is a crisis:
https://newoldage.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/09/10/getting-while-the-getting-is-good/#more-15871